


is there somewhere

by midnight_penguins



Series: room 93 [1]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series), Thomas Sanders, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Cuddling, M/M, Skating, Song - Freeform, affair, blowjob(singular), patton is a smooth mf, sorry for the roman angst lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-18
Updated: 2019-09-18
Packaged: 2020-10-20 23:33:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20683769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/midnight_penguins/pseuds/midnight_penguins
Summary: A fic based on Is There Somewhere by Halsey





	is there somewhere

**Author's Note:**

> I would recommend listening to the song while reading.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=686SmDtBOu8

** _You were dancing in your tube socks in our hotel room, Flashing those eyes like highway signs_ **

“You look great.” 

Patton laughed joyfully, his eyes shining. He was wearing a got a dog question _ bark _? shirt, with a light blue skirt. Patton was also wearing long rainbow socks. 

“You really think so?”

Roman nodded. 

** _ Light one up and hand it over, rest your head upon my shoulder_ **

** _I just wanna feel your lips against my skin_ **

“Want one?” 

“Sure.” 

Roman took a long drag from the cigarette. Patton leaned his head on Roman’s shoulder. Roman wanted to Patton to kiss him until he fell apart and panted with need.

** _White sheets, bright lights, crooked teeth, and the nightlife, You told me this is right where it begins_ **

Roman arrived at the motel. He found their room and found Patton already there. The bright fluorescent lights flickered uncertainly. 

Patton grinned at Roman crookedly. 

“You made it!” 

Roman walked over to Patton and immediately kissed him, hard and passionate. Patton groaned.

“This is where it begins.” 

Roman simply dragged him to the bedsheets. 

** _But your lips hang heavy underneath me, And I promised myself I wouldn’t let you complete me _ **

“Ngh!” 

Roman thought Patton gave the best blowjobs. He could feel Patton’s smirk against his skin. It was hot, and heavy.

***

Roman laid his head on Patton’s chest. Patton put his arm around Roman. 

“You were hot tonight.”

Roman laughed. “Thanks, Pat.” 

“If you could go anywhere, where would you go?”

“London.” Roman’s real answer was anywhere. As long as he was with Patton. It didn’t matter. He had promised himself that he wouldn’t fall for Patton. 

** _I’m trying not to let it show, that I don’t want to let this go_ **

** _Is there somewhere you can meet me?_ **

Roman woke up when the door slammed. Patton had already left to meet Logan. He pretended not to notice the tear trickling down his face. 

His phone buzzed. 

_ Same time Thursday? 😏🍆🍑 _

_ Always. _

He wanted Logan to go to hell.

** _Cause I clutched your arms like stairway railings_ **

** _And you clutched my brain and eased my ailing_ **

It was dark at the ice rink. Roman skidded on the ice and reached out for Patton.

Patton giggled softly. 

“You okay?”

“I’m fine,Padre. You’re holding me up!” 

Roman winked. 

“Wo-Woah!” He was spinning. 

Patton stopped him from falling. Patton kissed him and Roman swore he could see the stars. Roman almost forgot about his rule.

** _You’re writing lines about me, romantic poetry_ **

** _Your boy's got red in his cheeks_ **

_ He walks in beauty, like the night _

_ Of cloudless climes and starry skies; _

_ And all that’s best of dark and bright _

_ Meet in his aspect and his eyes; _

_ Thus mellowed to that tender light _

_ Which heaven to gaudy day denies. _

_ One shade the more, one ray the less, _

_ Had half impaired the nameless grace _

_ Which waves in every raven tress, _

_ Or softly lightens o’er his face; _

_ Where thoughts serenely sweet express, _

_ How pure, how dear their dwelling-place. _

_ And on that cheek, and o’er that brow, _

_ So soft, so calm, yet eloquent, _

_ The smiles that win, the tints that glow, _

_ But tell of days in goodness spent, _

_ A mind at peace with all below, _

_ A heart whose love is innocent! _

Roman thought the poetry from Patton was sweet, and kind. It was hard to feel happy about. Not when it wasn’t for him originally.

** _Cause we’re something he can’t see_ **

** _And I try to refrain but you’re stuck in my brain_ **

Roman remembered when Patton suggested they start the affair.

“But what if he finds out, Pat?”

“He won’t Roman. Logan’s like an android. He’ll be too busy working at his astronomy job.”

“Alright…” 

***

_ Sorry, Can’t tonight. Dinner with Logan’s family. _

_ Oh. Alright. _

Roman had tried everything to forget about Patton. It didn’t work. 

** _All I do is cry and complain, because second’s not the same_ **

Roman felt the tears racing down his face. They tasted of salt. He hoped Patton was fucking happy. Just for once in his life, he wanted to be put before Logan. Being second place fucking sucked. He cried until he could no longer. 

***

_ You are invited to Logan Berry and Patton Sanders’ Wedding! _

_ Date: 5/24/20 _

_ Time: 6 pm _

_ Where: Farmhouse _

_ 703 Church St, Orlando, Florida _

_ Please RSVP by 10/30/19. _

** _I’m sorry but I fell in love tonight_ **

** _I didn't mean to fall in love tonight_ **

“What the fuck Patton? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I tried.”

“I’m sorry, but I love you!”

“We can’t keep doing this, Roman.”

“I didn’t mean to.”

** _You’re looking like you fell in love tonight_ **

** _Could we pretend that we’re in love?_ **

“Don’t you love me too? Can’t we play pretend? Please, my love?”

“I can’t fucking do that Roman.” Patton shouted. 

“This was your idea in the first place. How could you?” 

** _I’m sorry but I fell in love tonight_ **

** _I didn't mean to fall in love tonight_ **

“I love you,” Roman whimpered, “I’m sorry. I tried so hard _ not _to.” His tears were falling,rapidly, down his face. 

“It’s not my fault that you failed.” 

“Yes, it is!” Roman cried, “It was your idea.”

** _You’re looking like you fell in love tonight_ **

** _Could we pretend that we’re in love?_ **

“Don’t you love me too?” 

“I never did,” Patton whispered as he wiped tears from his eyes. 

“Couldn’t we pretend? For one last night?” Roman begged. 

Patton shook his head and left the motel. 

Roman closed his eyes. He had tried to not fall, tried to forget. It didn’t work. No matter what,he felt anguished. Perhaps he would fall again, for someone else. Someone less cruel. 

He wanted to feel happy for Patton, he really did. Roman tried. But he couldn’t. Not after Patton had been so _ awful _. Roman didn’t think he could live here anymore. 

So he packed his bags, and moved to Chicago. Far away, from the pain that was Orlando, he was happy.

**Author's Note:**

> She Walks in Beauty by Lord Byron
> 
> https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/43844/she-walks-in-beauty
> 
> Lyrics from:
> 
> https://genius.com/Halsey-is-there-somewhere-lyrics


End file.
